The World's Lamest Jokes!

   I'm getting so absent minded that sometimes in the middle of a sentence I... uh... Here are the world's lamest jokes, ladies and germs! They have all been painstakingly collected by yours truly, the Sk8er Boy. I found them in Readers Digests, joke books, and Christmas crackers. Have you heard the rope joke? Skip it.

"Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I do this!"

"Then don't do that."

Probably the world's lamest joke. Of course, all the doctor doctor jokes are lame, but this one takes the proverbial cake.

Wife: I'm afraid the mountain air would disagree with me.

Husband: My dear, it wouldn't care.

Terrible pun.

Judge: Order in this court! I'll have order in this court!

Man: I'll have a hamburger with onions!

Hmm, I'm hungry.

What do you call artificial spaghetti? Mockaroni!

Someone obviously doesn't know that SPAGHETTI AND MACARONI ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!

"Doctor, doctor, my eye hurts when I drink hot chocolate!"

"Then take the spoon out."

Sorry, I just had to slip this doctor doctor joke in. I promise it's the last one.

Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho-ho-ho!

What??

What kind of cheese does a dog like on it's pizza? Mutts-arella.

Since when do dogs eat pizza?

What do you do you do with a blue monster? Cheer it up!

Obviously.

How do you get milk from a cat? Take away it's saucer.

I thought this would be a good joke... and the first part is! But it has a terrible punchline... and that's sorta supposed to be the good part.

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can't tuna fish!

I hate tuna :P

And here I end your misery. You can stop groaning now.